I thought that I was certain. I actually was very certain that I loved him so much that I would do anything...anything at all, to just have things work out perfectly with him...again.
For over a year and a half, everything was all about him. Or at least I thought so.
But now I am confused.
During the first few months together, he would do anything for me and regretfully, I took him for granted.
Then snapped, I lost him.
And just like that, I suddenly realised how much I needed him.
I did everything I could just to have him back.
Yes, we were back together. But I could always feel the wall he had put up. He had learnt how to play on the safe side but I hadn't.
I gave it all in, just like the way he had done before. Guess karma really knows it way around. And I got hurt over and over again.
But every time that I wanted to give up on us, he would pull me back and kept me close.
I don't know what it was; either he would never let go of me, or I would stay forever and never leave.
Almost two weeks ago, late Saturday night, it was over...just like that.
I thought it would hurt. But no, it did not.
I am not sure whether I was that I did not love him in that way or I tend to felt things in delayed mode.
Maybe...I need him near as a brother?
Maybe...the thought of being bestfriend again once I feel ok comforts me?
But one thing for sure, I am not over him...but I do not know in which way.
